Gospel
Jesus said to his apostles:
“Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me,
and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me;
and whoever does not take up his cross
and follow after me is not worthy of me.
Whoever finds his life will lose it,
and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it.””Whoever receives you receives me,
and whoever receives me receives the one who sent me.
Whoever receives a prophet because he is a prophet
will receive a prophet’s reward,
and whoever receives a righteous man
because he is a righteous man
will receive a righteous man’s reward.
And whoever gives only a cup of cold water
to one of these little ones to drink
because the little one is a disciple—
amen, I say to you, he will surely not lose his reward.”
What are our priorities today?
Who do we put first?
As a Roman Catholic Deacon I often counsel couples who are preparing to marry. The conversation usually starts with them talking about there relationship. Where they met. How long have they been together.
If I ask them why they want to marry they will tell me about their unending love for each other and maybe even how they can’t imagine not being with the other. These aren’t bad things of course. They are wonderful and exciting and I am glad they have the devotion to each other.
But as I sit there listening to the wonderful sentiments they have for each other, I consider how I am going to help them understand that those feelings which are overwhelming and at their peak now …. will do little for them after they are married.
It is an impossible task. But we try.
We try and share with them as gently as possible that the marriage is not about feelings at all. It is about discipline and commitment and understanding that the vows they will recite soon are more about vows to God to make sure the other one person reaches heaven. We are taking on that promise. And if we are separated that promise to God does not go away for it is our promise to God.
It is also a vow to put this union ahead of all else in their life except their relationship with God. Ahead of work and family and children. Everything is second to this marriage. Except God.
It’s difficult for them to fathom that they could love God more than the fiancé. 90 percent of couples just did not receive the upbringing that taught them that they must put God first in all things…even in marriage. Actually, especially in marriage. For a relationship built on how both people feel each day is a marriage built on sand, and life is multiple storms ready to wipe that feeling completely away.
It is only after battling storms and keeping our oath to God and each other ….and only after understanding that God is the only divine person in the marriage…only then does the marriage grow in a love that goes beyond feelings into a lifelong relationship that grows deeper and closer to God.
That is what I wish I could tell them.
But they are inebriated in emotion right now. Maybe at the next session I think. Maybe when they come back with struggles. Maybe they will learn it on their own as they learn to stay the course and use their union to focus on God and weather the storms.
Today’s Gospel presents what the foundation of a relationship with God and those around us looks like. God is first. Everyone else is second.
There will be crosses to bear for everyone who claims to be a Christian.
Sometimes that cross is to continue to say yes to a marriage bond that is not what we remember signing up for. Sometimes it is making sure our children know the right priorities in life and that any relationship is 90% commitment and discipline, and 10% feelings.
But just maybe we will be able to raise children who understand better to love God with all our might and love others as ourselves.
All of us will bear crosses where those we love turn away because we choose God first. Children leave our house and often leave the faith and then are reluctant to see us because they know what we believe.
But Jesus was clear today. Nothing is ahead of God in our life. Not even those we love. The kingdom of God has an order to it that begins us blessings and graces and it is our way of living. But those of us who follow a savior who died in a cross need to understand that we will have our crosses too.
Following Jesus Christ is what we were created for and his love for us can surround us and carry us through all challenges. But we must choose him first.
Deacon Tony Pynes 
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